9. Learn to Value Individuality
Your individuality is what you are, forged by your interests, values, and experiences. Being in a relationship must never entail relinquishing what makes you, you. As per the Utah State University Extension, “A strong relationship is built on two people bringing their unique qualities to the relationship rather than one person losing themselves in the other.” When each of you maintains your individuality, the relationship is more interesting, with greater things to discuss and more to explore.
8. Keep Pursuing Your Passions
You had interests and hobbies before meeting your partner that brought you happiness. Don’t let them slip away just because you’re dating. Carving out time for your hobbies keeps your soul vibrant and brings vibrancy to your relationship. Your partner should encourage your personal development, and reciprocate likewise. Having individual hobbies enables you to bring something special into the relationship and provides you with interesting things to talk about and share.
7. Set Healthy Boundaries
Boundaries are important for respect and personal space. Setting boundaries is not that you love each other less, but that you care about each other so much that you respect individual needs. Some examples include having personal time to take care of oneself, respecting alone time, having friendships outside the relationship, and open communication about needs and expectations.
Ezra Counseling states that maintaining independence and having healthy boundaries is very important to a healthy relationship. Every partner should be able to keep their personality and not forget their own life just to please their partner.
6. Spend Time with Friends and Family
It’s quick to concentrate solely on your partner and overlook other significant individuals in your life. However, friendships and family relationships are critical for your general well-being. Find time to visit your friends and family regularly. Spending time away from your partner can make your time together all the more special. As they say, distance makes the heart grow fonder.
5. Communicate Openly and Honestly
Good communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. If you ever catch yourself losing yourself, discuss it with your partner. Be honest about your feelings and share ways you can grow together while preserving your individuality. This is a conversation that must be ongoing because both partners will change over time. A healthy relationship is one where both partners feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, concerns, and needs without fear of judgment.
4. Encourage One Another’s Dreams and Goals
Make your partner pursue their dreams, and ensure that they do the same for you. Even if your aspirations are not always in tandem, you should still respect them. For instance, if you both desire to start a business and attend school again, you can somehow support each other but still realize your dreams. As per the University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center, the act of celebrating each other’s milestones and successes generates an atmosphere in which individuals can develop well.
3. Preserve Your Own Social Identity
It is very easy to get into the routine of doing everything as a couple, but it is essential to have your own social identity. If you find yourself constantly being presented as someone’s partner rather than as yourself, it may be a signal that you need to establish some independence. Be sure to have conversations, express your own thoughts, and form connections with other people independent of your relationship. This allows you to be secure in your identity and makes sure that you’re not defined by your partner.
2. Create Time for Self-Reflection
It is important to take time to think about your personal development. Ask yourself what your personal aspirations are, apart from your relationship, if you’re still engaged in activities that bring you joy, and if you’re maintaining a good balance of love and autonomy. If you feel like you’re losing your identity, take a step back and make some changes. Your relationship should be a positive addition to your life, not something that detracts from who you are. Self-reflection also assists you in supporting your partner’s individuality.
1. Grow Together, Not Apart
As years go by, you and your partner will change. The secret to a successful relationship is growing together and not growing apart. With change come new beliefs, desires, and habits. Check in with each other on a regular basis and ensure you’re still on the same page with your values, dreams, and expectations. To grow together doesn’t require becoming the same individual—it requires ongoing respect and celebration of your unique selves while creating a shared life where both of you are able to flourish.
Remaining authentic within a relationship is all about balance. Love should never equate to losing yourself—it should equate to becoming the best version of yourself with your partner while also helping them become the best version of themselves as well.