Grief is a process that no one can avoid, but somehow it is still so personal and difficult to understand. If you have lost a loved one, the end of an affair, or the death of a dream that was meaningful to you, grief is a way of turning your life upside down. It is not only that one feels sad or would go on to shed tears—in such instances, a feeling of a tidal wave can be experienced, at times faint, overpowering, and always unique to you.
Most people, however, think that the grief process is mainly related to the death of a close person. Nevertheless, the figure odivorceng, the fighting between good friends, the coming down of a person with a chronic disease, or the destruction of long-term plans can be the reasons of grieving deeply. Grieving can be a silent visitor in one’s life that comes unexpectedly in any situation that breaks the person’s view of the usual or the self, such as job loss or the death of a pet that was dearly loved. With every death, the veil of what has been most familiar is lifted, and you are left to discover the depths of feelings you never knew existed.
Grief manifests differently. You may feel sadness, anger, guilt, relief, and sometimes even numbness—often all in one day—emotionally. Physically, you may experience fatigue, headaches, changes in appetite, sleep disturbances, or a feeling of ill health in general. You may struggle to concentrate, feel disconnected from life, or just go through the motions without actually living them.
Most are familiar with the concept of grief occurring in stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance—described by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. The stages can be helpful as a map, but grief is not usually a linear, predictable process. Not all people go through all the stages, and they don’t necessarily come in sequence. Grief can occur in waves, sometimes relenting, sometimes cropping up unexpectedly, particularly on anniversaries or significant dates.
One of the most valuable things you can do is to allow yourself to feel whatever arises, no matter how messy or contradictory it may be. Blocking feelings doesn’t make them disappear—it more likely keeps the hurt alive. Permit yourself to cry, become angry, laugh over a memory, or just feel nothing for a little while. There is no right or wrong in grieving.
Having others support you can be a big help. Even if you prefer to be alone, calling on friends, family, or a support group can lighten the load. Sometimes, just hearing someone out—without advice or judgment—can be a lifesaver. If you find it difficult to talk, journaling or talking to a grief counselor can help.
Self-care may seem out of reach when grief feels so overwhelming, but it’s necessary. Small things—getting rest, eating well, exercising, being in nature—can keep you grounded. Self-care does not “cure” grief; it provides you with tools to manage it.
Sometimes, mourning does not abate with the passage of time. You may feel stuck, consumed by yearning, or unable to go on, and it may be a symptom of complicated or prolonged grief. It may occur following exceptionally traumatic losses or after consecutive losses. Professional intervention can be your best friend in such cases. Requiring assistance is no sign of weakness—grief impacts both your heart as well as your health.
Finding meaning after a loss doesn’t mean forgetting or moving on completely. It’s about weaving the experience into your life, carrying memories and love forward, and finding ways to grow around the pain. Rituals, creative expression, and acts of remembrance—planting a tree, writing a letter, or sharing stories—can honor what you’ve lost while opening space for what comes next.
Grief is transforming, and it tends to do that in unpredictable ways. But with time, support, and kindness to yourself, it’s possible to rediscover hope, even joy. No timetable, no map—only one step, and then the next.