For generations, Princes William and Harry were the very picture of unity in the House of Windsor, two siblings tied together by blood but by the strange burdens of royal backfire. But their tale of tattered bond is now one of the old myths of the new monarchy—a cautionary myth that private tension can annihilate even the most entrenched traditions.
In the grueling years since Princess Diana’s death, William and Harry were compelled to rely on each other. They were reported to be glued together, and Kate Middleton was sometimes included, whose sense of humor and laugh conveyed her as much Harry’s friend as William’s girlfriend. According to former royal butler Grant Harrold.
They were close, he says, and Harry and Kate did socialize together even if William was absent—cassocked pub lunches, Saturday shop trips, and nights out with Harry’s then-girlfriend Chelsy Davy. When Harry became the best man at William and Kate’s wedding in 2011, his best man speech made Kate weep, something that appeared to confirm how close Harry and William used to be. Their closeness began irretrievably breaking down when Harry became seriously interested in Meghan Markle.
Tensions were reported to have reached a boiling point in 2018 when Harry felt that William was being unwelcoming to his then-fiancée. William did not intend to be critical and was simply trying to offer advice, and Harry felt it was judgmental.
Royal reporters say it escalated to the point where their father at the time, Prince Charles, had to intervene and stop the fight. The estrangement continued with Harry and Meghan becoming more and more detached from cooperative charity work, later resigning from their royal position entirely. Times that ensued have been filled with public exposés that revealed their home problems.
The Sussexes’ 2021 Oprah Winfrey interview, Harry’s soon-to-be-released memoir Spare, and the Netflix series surrounding the pair of them all painted a picture of tensions within the family. Harry blamed physical fighting with his brother and spoke of a culture of distrust and isolation. He grumbled at being abandoned when faced by ceaseless media intrusion, above all by the individuals to whom he had hoped to be safest. Few people believe Harry’s version.
Grant Harrold and others who are intimate with the royals remember an entirely different mood—one of humor, dinner at home, and William and Kate making a meal out of struggling to keep up with Harry. These versions blow Harry’s version of events, as possibly not having been what others remembered family life had been like at the time. The schism has caused repercussions far more serious than damaged egos.
Harry’s court action to rescind his security plans in Britain is used to highlight the real ramifications of his departure. No longer part of the working royal family, he was no longer automatically shielded as he had been before and needed to battle in court for it to be determined that it wasn’t safe to return to Britain with his family without full security measures.
Beyond these court controversies, Harry and Meghan pursued financial independence through media and business ventures. Reconciliation efforts were short-lived. Passing meetings in memorial processes or family reunions signify civility but not reconciliation. There has been an impression that William has planted a line in the sand, not willing to forgive unless there is an adequate apology and indicators of ongoing trust. With such accomplishments as King Charles’ illness, there has been no indication of thaw.
For the monarchy, brother estrangement is not family dissent—it’s a threat to the institution’s very conception of coherence and continuity. Princess Diana had prayed her sons would be at one, that William’s eventual role as king would be that much more secure with Harry in place. The estrangement now informs us how tenuous that vision was.
With the monarchical institution struggling to accommodate a modern age, William and Harry’s scandal serves as an emotional reminder that even beloved traditions are no more secure than family scandal, shifting expectations, and the unrelenting glare of public life.