Emotional abuse in a relationship is like having a slow leak in a tire—you may not realize it at first, but after a while, you, dazed and uncertain. Unlike physical abuse, emotional abuse you cannot see, but its effects can be just as profound and long-lasting. If you have ever caught yourself second-guessing your emotions, tiptoeing around someone, or isolating yourself from loved ones and friends, you may be going through more than a bad spell. Consider these 15 signs of emotional abuse in relationships to identify the red flags and believe in your instincts.
1. Your partner initiates fights for no reason. You and your partner are always fighting, usually about little things, and nothing you do seems right.
2. They misquote you. When you mention something simple—like needing assistance—they flip it around and make you feel you’re the issue for requesting it.
3. Their mood is everywhere. One moment you’re fine, and the next, they blow up on you. You don’t know what’s going to hit you, so you’re always on guard.
4. They check up on you. They have to know your phone, your internet, and even where you are, so you feel like you don’t have any space.
5. You feel inferior around them. Whether you’re sad, anxious, or just have the general feeling that you’re not good enough, their words and behaviors erode your sense of self.
6. They brush off your emotions. When you attempt to discuss something that hurt you, they dismiss it like you’re being too sensitive or over the top.
7. It’s always somehow your fault. Even when it isn’t on you at all, they turn things around so you’re the one apologizing.
8. They text constantly in an intrusive manner. If you don’t respond to a message quickly enough, they become upset, suspicious, or even angry.
9. They cause you to question yourself. They will deny something they’ve said or done, which leads you to question your memory or wonder if you’re losing your mind.
10. Love has conditions. Affection, praise, or bestowal upon you only when you do precisely what they desire.
11. They take you away from. Gradually, they limit you more and more from being with friends or relatives, thus you end up all alone.
12. They control you through fear. They may threaten to harm you, them, or someone else to have their way.
13. They never take responsibility for their own mistakes. Even when they clearly are in the wrong, they always have an excuse, or they blame someone else.
14. They pit you against others to bring you down. Whether it is your ex or your friend, they remind you of your shortcomings by comparing you unfavorably to someone else.
15. They do not honor your boundaries. When you request space, privacy, or simple respect, they treat it as unreasonable or ignore it altogether.