Loneliness isn’t a fleeting sensation anymore—it’s an epidemic public health problem that touches individuals of every age, ethnicity, and background. One in two adults now experiences loneliness, said U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy, with Americans spending more time by themselves and feeling more alone than they did two decades ago. And the consequences are severe: loneliness has been associated with increased levels of stress, depression, anxiety, and even premature death.
Meanwhile, technology and social media have entirely transformed how we connect. Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok, for example, guarantee us round-the-clock interaction, but what really happens is a more messy reality. Though they make it simple to keep up with people, they also have the tendency to substitute deeper, meaningful moments for instantaneous likes, brief comments, and never-ending scrolling. As Dr. Murthy noted, something as innocuous as wishing someone a birthday has changed from a kind phone call, to a Facebook status, to just an “HBD” text—each one moving us away from true connection.
Research indicates that the connection between social media and loneliness is not straightforward. It’s not a matter of cause and effect—it’s a matter of how, and why, we use them. A wide-ranging review by Laura Marciano at Harvard discovered that social media is highly linked with loneliness, particularly when we compare ourselves to others. Browsing through images of friends’ holidays or professional achievements can awaken covetousness and make us feel like we’re being left behind, which only increases feelings of isolation.
But comparison isn’t the sole reason. What we’re doing online also makes a difference. A cross-country study conducted by Tore Bonsaksen revealed that individuals who use social media primarily to uphold relationships tend to become lonelier the longer they spend on the internet. The reason is that cyber contact never provides the intimacy and responsiveness we seek. When web dialogues fall short of our desire for genuine connection, they leave us frustrated. On the one hand, individuals using social media primarily as an escape from boredom or sadness don’t necessarily feel more lonely—but neither do they feel more connected.
This creates a challenging vicious circle. A long-term survey of Chinese university students revealed that loneliness tends to drive individuals to social media in an attempt to plug the holes left by unfulfilling offline relationships. But the more dependent they become on it, the greater the risk of getting into unhealthy habits—constantly checking programs, experiencing anxiety when they are offline, and avoiding face-to-face interactions. This only weakens social abilities and increases isolation over time, and they get trapped in a cycle that is difficult to break.
Generational, as well as cultural, variation introduces additional complexity. The young, particularly teenagers and students, are particularly vulnerable to this. Marciano’s study indicated that over half of adolescents said they didn’t talk to anybody—online or offline—in the last hour, even though they were heavy users of social media. Texting frequently takes the place of more immersive methods of communication, such as phone or video calls, making it more difficult to detect emotion and authenticity. Older adults will experience loneliness for other reasons, perhaps: limited mobility, illness, or unfamiliarity with technology. The pandemic made it even more difficult by eliminating face-to-face interaction.
Culture also conditions the experience of loneliness. Bonsaksen’s study revealed that individuals in collectivist cultures, such as Norway, experienced lower loneliness compared to those living in more individualistic nations like the U.S., U.K., and Australia. More robust community connections and cultural norms regarding bonding can temper or exacerbate the impact of technology on belonging.
So where are we now? It seems research indicates that not all technology use is bad for us—it’s just about how we go about it. One-to-one digital contact, such as phone calls or video chatisre associated with less loneliness and improved mental health. Passive scrolling and ongoing comparison lead to the opposite. Some platforms are even adding features such as hiding like numbers or giving more prominent space to close friends’ updates to reduce the stress of competition and comparison.
Ultimately, the healthiest thing to do is use technology as a bridge, rather than a replacement. Taking time in person—even just getting coffee with a friend or a brief phone call—does more for our health than likes or numbers of followers. And when we are online, being careful about our motivations—information, inspiration, or actual connection, rather than for approval—can be all that stands between us and more problems.
Loneliness is a multifaceted issue, but if we can grasp how social media and technology influence it, we can begin to move toward creating genuine, lasting human connections in the digital age.