Have you ever asked yourself why certain families manage to pass on financial stability and confidence, generation after generation, whereas others just seem to worry about money forever? The key is rooted deep within family life—where attitudes, habits, and discussions around money shape our destinies quietly, often before we even notice.
Family structure and values greatly influence what matters most financially. A family with children may target savings for education and childcare, and multigenerational families may balance healthcare expenses and care for aging relatives. These objectives aren’t about dollars—they’re based on what’s most important to the family, whether that’s penny-pinching, experiences, or security. How a family decides to spend, save, or invest reflects directly on its shared beliefs and aspirations.
But it’s not necessarily what families do—it’s what they say and demonstrate. Kids are like little sponges, absorbing the money habits they witness in their homes. When families budget, save, or discuss finances openly, they’re setting a great example for their children without even realizing it. Conversely, if money is a secret or stress point, children can learn anxiety and confusion that can carry through to adulthood. As Dr. Lami explains, “Parents play a crucial role in shaping their children’s attitudes and behaviors towards money.” How parents manage their finances—whether they are spendthrifts, tightwads, or something in between—will establish the standard for the next generation.
As it happens, children begin developing emotional responses to money earlier in life than many parents realize. As reported in a study conducted by Craig Smith at the University of Michigan, “children as young as five already had distinct emotional reactions to spending and saving money, and that these translated into actual, real-life spending behaviors.” Some children are born savers, some are born to spend, and these habits aren’t necessarily a repeat of their parents’. But the family culture—particularly open discussion and clear communication—can steer kids in the direction of healthier money decisions.
For families with deeper issues, such as generational poverty or financial exploitation, it can seem impossible to get to a place of financial health. But it is possible, and often begins with a change in attitude. Transcending a mentality of scarcity to one of potential, becoming a long-term planner, and developing self-leadership are all key steps. As described by Lampados Financial, “Breaking the cycle of generational poverty is not only possible—it’s achievable through structured actions, financial knowledge, and mindset transformation.” This involves budgeting, creating emergency savings, paying off debt, and retraining or getting an education in order to increase earning power.
Survivors of financial abuse also have distinctive challenges, but rebuilding is achievable through the right support and approaches. Heather Black, owner of Supermums, has witnessed how retraining and starting a new career can be the key to enabling individuals to take back control of their money and futures. As she explains, “Financial resilience refers to the ability to withstand and recover from financial adversity.
For financial abuse survivors, the achievement of financial resilience requires not only career rebuilding but also the development of financial independence and security.” To do this may take learning marketable skills, establishing a budget, and developing a support system.
So how can families become financially resilient as a unit? It begins with open, honest discussion—regular family meetings where everyone can have their goals, concerns, and ideas heard without fear of judgment.
Having family meetings, speaking in “I” statements, and working together towards common goals can keep discussions positive and productive. Engaging children in ways that are appropriate for them—such as allowing them to participate in grocery shopping or family budgeting—can turn daily moments into powerful teaching opportunities.
Collaborative planning is paramount. When everyone in the family has a say in the decision-making, it’s more likely to establish common goals and remain committed to them. This could involve creating an overall financial plan, reviewing periodically, and having the flexibility to adjust as circumstances shift. Tools such as decision trees or payoff matrices can aid families in considering choices and making smart decisions collaboratively.
Eventually, the attitudes and habits we learn in the home cascade out into the world, influencing not only our own economic futures, but also the ones of generations yet to come. By being positive role models, by communicating honestly, and by getting on the same page together, families can make money a source of progress, security, and mutual dream-building.